When you do it, it feels right.
When I do the same thing, it feels wrong.
That’s how most arguments begin.

“We see the world, not as it is, but as we are.” – Stephen R. Covey

We don’t experience the world as it is.
We experience it through who we are.
Our histories.
Our emotions.
Our fears and hopes.

Same action.
Same intention.
Different labels.

👉 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂, 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁. 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗺𝗲, 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗲𝗴𝗼.
↳ same boundary, different judgment.

👉 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂, 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀. 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗺𝗲, 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗱𝗼𝘂𝗯𝘁.
↳ same care, different assumption.

👉 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝗱, 𝘆𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗯𝘂𝘀𝘆. 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁, 𝗜’𝗺 𝗮𝘃𝗼𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴.
↳ same silence, different story.

👉 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀, 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆’𝗿𝗲 𝘃𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗱. 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗲, 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆’𝗿𝗲 “𝘁𝗼𝗼 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵.”
↳ same feeling, different value.

Problems don’t start because people are bad.
They start because lenses are biased.

Wisdom is not proving you are right.
Wisdom is checking whether your scale is fair.

Before reacting, ask just one question:
If I were on the other side, would I still think this way?

That question alone builds better leaders,
stronger relationships,
and calmer conversations.